courage is not for the faint at heart...

This is a blog I have wanted to write for a few weeks. A few weeks ago marked the anniversary of the death of one of the finest creatures I have ever had the opportunity to meet. The way we met was crazy. Imagine walking to a hospital at pivitol time in your life, trying to make big decisions about which path to take in life, and here is this vibrant man, in his 20's, dying of cancer, fighting for his life and knowing everything he has tried to do to survive has failed and his time is ending. Walking into his room, I say hello, and I am mistaken for his nurse, and then I sit and talk with him and realizes I am a friend of his sister and brother in law. And he asks what I am doing there, which seems so unimportant, and I can't answer because my problems seem so small. I ask how he is, and frustrated he says, "how the fuck would you feel if you were dying?". I couldn't answer. We talked about the weather and we joked about the heat. He said the upside of being in the hospital is the air conditioning is blast in his room in the heat! As I leave his room, I said can I visit tomorrow? He replied "why would you want to? But if u must, go a head." Over the next couple of weeks, I visited everyday, and the stress of my life wasn't as important as it once was. We laughed and joked, and then one afternoon he asked if everyone would forget him? I have to admit, I was emotional by this question. And I said his smile would live on forever in his neices, his stories would live forever in his friends and family, his love would live on forever in his sister and his parents, and what he had done for me, how could I ever forget him... I think some of the things we worry about in life are trivial. One of the biggest things I took away from him was live your life happily, because you never know when its going to be over. Also, his positive spirit! Last night when I went for a walk, I sat at the lakeshore on a rock and marvelled at the wonder all around me. The geese, the fresh crisp air... I am never going to let a day go past me where I don't thank my lucky stars for all of the positive blessings in my life. Bob, I will never ever forget you, our friendship was short, but educational. Sorry so long to write this...